Soon, the day of romancing the heart, or, more commonly known as Valentine’s Day, will emerge to grab our attention as a time of acknowledging love. Whether requited or unrequited, on this day people are given permission to state — with roses, candy, poems — those hidden feelings secretly tucked away in the privacy of their throbbing hearts.
Last week’s blog on duende talked how a “duende love” goes below the surface and swims down to the bottom of the well of grief and grasps hold of those gold and silver coins thrown by well-wishers who remain at the top too timid to make the plunge.
An authentic love, Rilke would write, is more than the ecstatic yelps of orgasm “however vibrant that makes one’s voice”.
Valentine’s Day is the celebration of love between two people, for sure. But what about the love of Self? Shouldn’t we also take the time to honour the love we have (or should have) for our own unique place on this earth?
It’s not always easy to peel away the layers of who we are, where we have come from and where we might be going.
But one thing is certain. Unless we first honour who we are — and this means honouring both the dark and light places within our hearts — then attempting to be with the Other in any loving and lasting way, could prove to be difficult.
Therefore, along with giving out the red roses on Valentine’s Day or that special box of Belgium chocolate, let’s not forget to give ourselves the first bite.
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